Filed under: Politics, Ve, broken kinks, feminism, fetish | Tags: bigotry, fashion, parents, pvc, sex ed, young kinksters
There is a small store in Malmoe, the city that I live in during the summer. Sweden is not like London, but I guess that comes to no surprise to you, dear reader. We do not have the Camden or the specialised areas were you can find any kind of outfit if you are drawn to a specific subculture like goth, or if you are in to the more fetishy versions of gothclothes. There is no racks filled with corsets, pvc and other almost generic types of clothing. Basically, there is not the same luxury of being able to find a kink-item around every corner like you can do in the U.K. But I am not complaining about that. A couple of days ago I visited the same store to relive some of my teen memories (black hair and black eyeliner, patches with bandnames like Nine Inch Nails and Broder Daniel ironed on to the shoulderbag) and to browse the fab fake eyelashes I know they stock. While walking around browsing I noticed a very weird sign telling me that unless I was 18 years of age or above, I was not allowed to try or buy a pvc-item. HUH? Yep, that is correctly understood. Walking around in the store I could not help but notice that clothing like corsets, underwear, certain types of ‘bondagetrousers’ (you know the sort with buckles and straps and things that thin gothboys love to wear) as well as high heels and boots had no age restriction. Only the pcv. I am a curious person, can’t help it, so I just had to ask the stuff what this restriction was about. She was very helpful and explained it was not the store that had come up with this on their own accord, rather than parents who had been upset when their offspring had brought this types of clothing back home. Apparently it had something to do with being ‘appropriate’ as well as then sexual overtones that pvc as an item is carrying. The bad will received around this item had forced the store to strike a compromise and hence the age-restriction. She also pointed out that there is the possibility to ‘go to parties dressed in these items’ and that had also effected the opinions of the parents. So: beware under-aged pervert! No can have pvc! Seriously though, during the conversation I said quite blunt that I myself go to parties like that and am very well aware of the connotations that pvc as a material carry itself. My amazement was hard to disguise but I bid a polite farewell and went out of the door. Steaming of anger. First of all: the parties. There is a couple of parties in this part of Sweden, but not many. None of the allow you to gain entry if you are underaged (18). So not only are the parties rare but they are also guarded like any other club by that rule. Second: how about the corsets? The boots, the high heels? The bondagetrousers, the sweater with all the straps that you can ‘get stuck’ in? The ‘cute’ underwear in sizes that would fit any 12 year old goth girl? All of these items also carry strong sexual connotations, as well as being very ‘inappropriate’ (depending on whom you ask…). What the fuck is wrong with parents? I see very young girls getting thongs bought by their parents, see the streamlining of the ‘appropriate’ child being orchestrated, hearing the complaint about items being charged with certain implications but seeing none of the action being directed in any healthy manner… How about some jolly good, practical sex ed? Some parenting, so that if the kid go to these parties and the organizer is such a dick/cunt that they let them in, the kid will know of the consequences of breaking the rules from their parent. I am not a parent, thank heavens and to be honest I don’t like kids, especially not teen-agers. Or toddlers, or any kids for that matter. So the whole ‘raising a (b)rat and things I do not know of, but one thing I do know is that I am tired of people not taking responsibility. Or misguiding their responsibility. So, yeah. I live in Sweden. A country with fresh air, social security and no more censorship of movies. But it is also a country in which the double-standard and confused messages that are sent to young people make a store quit selling a certain clothes-item to under-aged. Where the prostitutionlaw is bollocks and were the scare of ‘everything’ makes the political establishment call for more control. Nice.
//
Ve
Filed under: Politics, Vanilla stuff, Ve | Tags: Abortion rights, christian fundamentalism, feminism, George Tiller, Right Wing Idiots, sexual politics
Words cannot express how I feel after a couple of days in Prague. Not because it was beautiful and the food was amazing. But because of The Guardian I pick up on the airport back home to a schorching hot London. As always, the vacation ended up us being in a world of it’s own, not noting very much of what is actually happening and the newspaper reminded me of many things.
Not only are over 200 people in a plane missing, presumed dead, somewhere between Brazil and Paris, but George Tiller, a doctor who performed late abortions in the U.S was shot on the 31st of may 2009 by a right-wing, christian fundamentalist nutter/idiot.
I am not going to write about the great deads of Tiller, glorification is not what I do best. Instead I want to point towards the women that came to his clinic, in dire need of medical help and emotional support.
It is their bodies, it is their life and nothing can take that away from them. Except that people try to. And managed to kill Tiller. There is not really much to say, other than ” Take your rosaries off my ovaries ” and continue the struggle.
//
Ve
I know, I know. The posts are not as frequent or nearly as many as they should. School is taking time and energy and my writing paws has been focused on touching skin lately. Am very happy and looking forward to the summer coming. Will be back in my home town and therefore not clubbing very much, leaving time to write and to long for the people of London. This is a quick update to inform about a new link to a blog, Island of pain, swedish based but english speaking(writing) with loads of interesting reading.
I’m going back to revision now, exams are coming up. I do miss writing here, but all in due time.
What would you like to read about by the way?
//
Ve
Filed under: Politics, Ve, bdsm, feminism | Tags: a good read, bdsm, feminism, pol, Progress, sex, sex war, sexual politics
I know. I am good at finding loads of interesting things to read, rather than writing my own post. What is worse is that I choose to post them here, instead of writing properly. And my excuse? I have none! The guide to shopping seem to come to nothing for the moment.
Anyhow. There is the ‘research’ that has been conducted by a certain blogger that resulted in the conclusion that male dom’s are bawwd pwepol, women are conditioned victims and BDSM is, by default the carrier of all bad things that patriarchy stands for. To follow all that, the ever so brilliant SM-feminist has all the action collected here. Letters of Gehennas ‘The Shareef Don’t Like It’ is a post with the short version of all the things that has come up during these discussions.
But what is the most brilliant thing is the recent development, is this and this.
The most amazing post this week though, is Habu’s ‘Of Kink…’ and the week get of to a good start with these words from the post
“I’ve always been where the front lines are when it really matters, and if that’s not “feminist” enough for those with smoke blowing out their ears from behind they keyboards, my answer really comes down to ‘Tough shit.’
They’ve got a problem with it, it’s their problem, not mine.”
Filed under: Politics, Pr0n, Vanilla stuff, Ve, broken kinks, discussions, feminism | Tags: a good read, adult video news, commonfuckingsense, feminism, madison young, object & subject, Pr0n, Progress, racism, sexual politics, the broken kinks, violet blue, what is wrong with idiots?
Apparently, there is even shaky things going on in the pr0nbuisness. If I hear one more person saying the words ‘credit’ and ‘crunch’ in the same sentence I will probably tie a noose and give it to that person. But apparently, even the buisness of picturing people making whopiee is feeling it and trying to find ‘new’ ways of continue being able to sell. Violet Blue (she is awesome and will have her link in the list ASAP) writes about the question of ‘interracial’ pr0n and the ‘humour’ and ‘tongue in cheek’ of the mainstream pr0n companies that is not supposed to be racism at all. Or is it? Where is the titles like ‘Oh, no she is fucking a white, ugly middleclass, fat idiot with nothing behind his skull‘ . But then again, pr0n is big buisness, that title would not sell and buisness must go on, giving people what they want. Yeah right. Adult Video News (AVN) claims that interracial pr0 is the recessionproof category in adult video industry, but Violet Blue is examining that statement in this brilliant column in San Fransisco Chronicle pointing towards standards and racism in the industry of pr0n.
We all know about roleplay and taboos being broken but Blue hit the nail on the head when she says:
“On closer inspection, there’s something more than a little disingenuous about AVN’s sense of humor. We all know that porn is built to part you with your hard-earned cash and proffer fantasies; sometimes certain kinds of fantasy or roleplaying can be sexy: taboos, whether actual or perceived, are always hot, right? The positive ability of porn is that is can show partnering that is charged because it crosses racial boundaries; I believe that damage is not done by the FACT of crossing those taboos, but in the WAY those taboos are crossed.”
AVN responded with what can only be describes as a unfounded, personal attack on Blue, rather than thinking about what the implications of her text and questions actually mean.
To read the whole story, click here.
This is so fucking important to talk about with the mainstream pr0nindustry that exists today. And it stinks of racism, orientalism, sexism and plain stupidity. Cause there is so much more to it. This blatant commersialised shit does not get me turned on, but someone else might. I don’t like pr0on to be honest. I am tired of going through hords of shit to find 3 minutes of hotness. Cause the stereotypes are nothing more.Madison Young who is interviewed for the column puts it perfectly by saying:
“The LA porn world has gotten to the point where the majority of the material that they are producing is something that I would call ‘fast food porn.’ It’s junk food. Offensive and artery-clogging porn.”
I like organic things, I like food where I can taste something and recognise it as an actual taste. But must confess that I occasionally have a burger or two. D00m on me. How about you?
//
Ve
Filed under: About us, Vanilla stuff, feminism, silia | Tags: day to day life, Gender Politics, Lessons in life, rants, silia, the lost big O
Hi, I know, Sorry, haven’t written for a while. I sort of started another blog that isn’t as secret as this one and sort of started writing there instead. Mostly about religion.
But right now I’m listening to a documentary about the female orgasm, and I felt like making a short contribution.
It’s interesting, because even if we are sort of equal now, and even though everybody knows that the female orgasm exists, people still seem to think that the female orgasm is harder to achieve than the male. This isn’t true. At all. It takes about four minutes for a female to reach orgasm when DIYing, it’s the same amount of time it takes for a male. What makes the female orgasm harder to reach, more elusive and all that BS, is that we have constructed our sex around the male perspective. The focus is still on vaginal penetration, one of the hardest ways to reach orgasm, if not assisted by clitoral stimulation (bar blow jobs, but you know what I mean.).
I know I’m one of those who have a really hard time to reach orgasm during sex with another person. Autoerotically, I get annoyed if I only get one, and usually get three. Yes, I do multiples on my own. But with another person involved, I can’t. This has nothing to do with inability physically. It’s all in my brain. It’s probably about techniques, but the mind is in the way for even getting that far. I know everything about everything that is to know about sex, but I cannot relax. Not that far. No. This is seriously sad.
I know one reason for this: I seldom take my time to actually get horny before I have sex. I have a hard time taking control over my own sexlife, I don’t want to be the driving force. This combined with all these heaps of men who actually don’t care about your orgasm, especially not if they have theirs first. I did have some great sex last weekend, with a guy who took the time to kiss me enough to make my knees weak. That worked. I didn’t orgasm, but I was closer then usual. I think that this guy might make me relax enough to let me actually explore, get horny, and have that damn orgasm.
I admire and envy all you who just orgasm away just like that, who can be that confident. I can’t. But give me a couple of years and I’ll join you. 
I’ll be back in a week, I need to rant about the hymen myth aswell.
