Hi, I know, Sorry, haven’t written for a while. I sort of started another blog that isn’t as secret as this one and sort of started writing there instead. Mostly about religion.
But right now I’m listening to a documentary about the female orgasm, and I felt like making a short contribution.
It’s interesting, because even if we are sort of equal now, and even though everybody knows that the female orgasm exists, people still seem to think that the female orgasm is harder to achieve than the male. This isn’t true. At all. It takes about four minutes for a female to reach orgasm when DIYing, it’s the same amount of time it takes for a male. What makes the female orgasm harder to reach, more elusive and all that BS, is that we have constructed our sex around the male perspective. The focus is still on vaginal penetration, one of the hardest ways to reach orgasm, if not assisted by clitoral stimulation (bar blow jobs, but you know what I mean.).
I know I’m one of those who have a really hard time to reach orgasm during sex with another person. Autoerotically, I get annoyed if I only get one, and usually get three. Yes, I do multiples on my own. But with another person involved, I can’t. This has nothing to do with inability physically. It’s all in my brain. It’s probably about techniques, but the mind is in the way for even getting that far. I know everything about everything that is to know about sex, but I cannot relax. Not that far. No. This is seriously sad.
I know one reason for this: I seldom take my time to actually get horny before I have sex. I have a hard time taking control over my own sexlife, I don’t want to be the driving force. This combined with all these heaps of men who actually don’t care about your orgasm, especially not if they have theirs first. I did have some great sex last weekend, with a guy who took the time to kiss me enough to make my knees weak. That worked. I didn’t orgasm, but I was closer then usual. I think that this guy might make me relax enough to let me actually explore, get horny, and have that damn orgasm.
I admire and envy all you who just orgasm away just like that, who can be that confident. I can’t. But give me a couple of years and I’ll join you. 🙂
I’ll be back in a week, I need to rant about the hymen myth aswell.