A loveletter (on bondage and other important matters of the world)

When I then went to Sweden for the summer, I realized I needed something that was seemingly like a project. Something to focus on. With me I had the usual toys, but also 3 lengths of gorgeous jute-rope and some books on tying people  up. And in the end, I did exactly that, tying,  at every opportunity I had. It started very shaky, fiddly, plain weird and often not entirely correct.  But I continued, and it’s Messy ropestill often shakey, fiddly, plain weird and not correct, but  sometimes I’m  getting things right. But what then is ‘right’ when it comes to bondage? I will get back to that later. Anyhow, rope took up a lot of my thoughts,   and the need of doing more was evident. I wanted to be tied and I wanted to tie.

So what can a giNice ass....rl do? First of all, convince a dominant playpartner that she needed to practice on him. And she dShortcuts...id, took some silly shortcuts, but in the same time had a load of fun.

And then,Stockholm Pride was about to take place, and with that I knew that many kinksters would be in the Swedish capital, and some of them are ropesluts and riggers to the bone, loving the rope and loving to have fun with it.  In the light of this, I posted an event on Darkside’s calendar, with the thought it would be a peer-to-peer rope workshop. Come as you are, with what you have, what you want to give and what you might want to get to learn. What I thought would be a small-scale thing turned out to be anything but. 25 people in the grass outside the Pride Park, talking, tying, learning, getting tied, laughing, eating, and everything in between.Rope at Pride

I was not prepared for this, but nonetheless, so very happy. Because I was tying, getting tied up and could watch others do the same thing.  All while people was passing by, some stopped to ask questions, others stopped and asked politely if they could get tied up. The police came around, arguing that their metal handcuffs was faster and quicker, but we pointed out how much more fun rope can be, as well as more versatile. In the end they agreed. I wanted to ask one of them if I could tie her, but she was in uniform and had a busy evening ahead, so I did not ask.. But one day I will tie a police. Just wait.
Much more tying took place during the Pride, and the sheer possibility to meet so many people and get so much input felt like a massive boost.
I thought that since I was not a resident in Stockholm that certain ropemeet would not go any further but at least two new and different ropemeets are now up and running, and there has also been ironic complaints that it is hard to fit it all into the calendar. It ranges from clubs organizing evenings to private meetings in people’s homes.

Going back in the car that Sunday after Pride meant that we both felt sad and confused but we still decided to stay and go for a nekkid swim in a random lake along the way down to the south of the country. We did and there I had one more of those revelations. I asked a dear friend if I could tie her up there, in the grass, next to the lake.  The way it felt, the way we laughed together and the strong feeling of being free and strong sounds like a hippie-dream but hey, then I guess that I am a hippie.

CaptchurdAnd I guess it was there that it dawned on me. That I really love rope. I think it did not start out as love, it started out as something to do during the summer, or maybe something that had to do with being fed up with seeing so few women tying in clubs. But it quickly became more than that. It is a calm but focused space, a rush and a smell, extending or drowning myself. Safe but still insecure. And again I find that words let me down so very easily when it supposed to deal with matters such as sex. But how the words are empty is another post that I will deal with later on.

An example can be Korrosion. By accident, we managed to meet eachother this summer, at a musicfestival, and although she quickly defined herself as a straight woman, there was something there that

Korrosion tied and masked

Korrosion tied and masked

ended up with many wonderful playsessions. If we disregard from the fact that she seem to become somewhat pansexual when she dress up in latex or get played with, there is something that should not work in this equation. A straight woman and another queer woman. But hey, lust and experiences often don’t walk hand in hand, and when you throw in some latex, some rope, maybe dancing in a club or just talking the night away, anything can happen. And it did. Over and over again. It did not need to be  overtly sexual (many times BDSM for me do not need to be an actual physical sexual act) to be an enjoying mutual exchange of heaps of fun.

In another post I intend to examine the need of neutralising/naturalising BDSM, but not here. I just want to clearly express that it is not what I am doing. I connect sexually, but the acts themselves do not need to be neccessarily sexual, or what people perceive as sexual. Anyhow, enough on me digressing on that subject.

I was talking about playing with Korrosion. And how it clicked in our heads, and sometimes it did not click, but hey it did not matter. Because when it did click, it was so amazing. I want to play with people who enjoy playing, no, not enjoy, who get lost in the play, a mindset

A collaboration with Ropefiend

A collaboration with Ropefiend

that is so much more than plain, good enjoyment as in enjoying a movie. That is what I feel like when tying Korrosion. That is what I feel like when playing with the people that are important people in my life. I can vanish into the people involved, and they vanish into me and nothing else but the senses matter.
And all of these things I wanna feel with others who feel the same thing.

So the summer went by, missing J, but also learning, and one of the more fun things with this was tying together with other riggers such as Ropefiend (see pic for our collaboration). It made me really think to do other things, to see rope from someone else’s eyes. And often I have to resist the temptation of watching those who tie me up. Because I can’t try to learn all the time 🙂

The past summer’s exploration has made me realise many things about my self, and I want to thank all of those who have been a part of my life for this time Either as riggers, bunnies, bystanders, or those who did have nothing at all to do with the ropes. And of course J, who’s encouragement has made me want to do it even more.

But now, Korrosion, my dearest ropeslut, hurry back to London!

Ropes

For those interested in rope, I will add two new links to our list, which is my new favorite forum on the internetz and the other is a awesome blog that I discovered the other day.

Bondage Forum is run by Esinem & Convolvulus

Then there is Spokewench who writes about bondage & self-bondage (must learn this!), feminism and D/S. What is there not to like with this? I guarantee that her pics are inspiring.

Lots of love to you all

//
Ve

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2 responses to “A loveletter (on bondage and other important matters of the world)

  • Ropefiend

    Ah, the summer of 09. Good times!
    Reading this makes me want to go back and relive it all over again.

    We really do have to do another collaboration some time.

    • Ve

      As soon as possible, indeed. Got a workshop coming up in november, looking forward to that one very much.

      BTW, a post on needles is coming up very soon 🙂

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